Wednesday, November 05, 2008


Today at lunch, the girls and I had a rather interesting conversation. Let me fill you in on my lunch friends.

S is my age and has been married for almost 16 years. She has 4 kids. Her husband is an alcoholic. They stay married for the kids and because they're barely making it and can't afford a divorce.

R is my age also and is on her second marriage. They've been married for 7 years with each bringing their own children into the mix. This alone causes friction in the relationship.

Y is married but separated with 3 kids. She hasn't seen her husband in more than 8 years. He doesn't pay child support. He hasn't even seen the kids all these years. Not only can she not afford divorce, but she can't even find him in order to divorce him.

Daddeee and I are coming upon our 15th anniversary. We have issues. Not serious issues, really, but thought provoking issues.

So here's the idea we came up with. We should just completely do away with divorce. Instead, marriage should come with an expiration date. We all agreed that 5 years sounded good. At the end of your 5 year marriage, you have the option to renew or just let it expire and go your separate ways.

Anyone getting married knows ahead of time that for at least 5 years, they're tied to this person. No more option of divorce. Now, we did think about the what ifs that can arise such as abusive spouses, etc. Those situations would have to be dealt with on a case-by-case basis.

So what do you think? Is this a good idea or just the warped idea of a bunch of grumpy women? Would you renew your marriage at your next 5 year interval?

1 comment:

Danielle said...

Well ... I think your friend could probably file for divorce and be granted one on abandonment alone. Not alot of money other than filing fees.

With regard to expiration ... my girlfriends and I say a marriage license should be like a drivers license "renawable" ... Either you do or you don't. Your choice. Every 4 years ... You need to fill out the paper work and renew. This way you actually have to think about it.

Here I am ... 8 years married..... 16 years into the relationship with 1 kid, and 2 stepkids... hymmm would I have renewed?