YOU CAN'T KILL CARTMAN...YOU BASTARDS!!...
Hehehehe it's too funny. The other night, before the ice and snow, I was on my home from work when I came upon a Cartman doll in the road not far from home. I think I ran him over. I wasn't the first to squish poor Cartman. He had more tracks on him than a crackhead.
Now that wasn't the end of poor Cartman's journey. We had a big ice storm last week. For 2 nights in a row, we got ice pelted on us along with freezing temperatures. That was followed by a weekend of more freezing temps and sleet and snow.
Now this poor Cartman figure has been through the ice trucks sprinkling salt on the roads, snow plows scraping the streets, and whatever traffic flows down Brighton Avenue. He's still holding strong!
I look for him each night on my way home from work. He's there, in the street, each night. He's looking pretty worn yet he's still holding strong.
I wonder to myself each night if I should pull over and pick up this poor Cartman...rescue him from his terrible fate.
But, alas, it's too damn cold!
Note: For anyone that doesn't know, Cartman is a character from Comedy Central's South Park